Do you feel stuck in life? Do you feel that no matter what you do, things are not moving forward? In this podcast, you will learn about the 11 dangerous attributes that keep people stuck!

What’s Covered In This Episode

  • Why “fear” is one of the biggest reasons why people do not take action?
  • What are the different types of fear?
  • What is “conformity” and how to overcome this?
  • The negative effects of “blaming” others.
  • What does “previous conditioning” have to do with success?
  • How “family and friends” influence you to stay mediocre?
  • The negative side of “rigid thinking”
  • The effects of having a “bad attitude”
  • What is the difference between false ego and real ego?
  • Why it’s important to always keep learning?

All this and more will be covered in this podcast.

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Sidz is a college drop-out, "musician turned digital geek", a spiritually grounded minimalist, father of 2, and husband of a loving wife. He founded the Internet Lifestyle Hub in 2018 to fix the education and employment system for good. Currently, he is helping over 30,000+ coaches, teachers, and experts digitize their knowledge. He’s an international best-selling author of the book You Can Coach and is on a mission to help 1,000,000 people live a lifestyle of freedom!

    75 replies to "11 Dangerous Attributes That Keep People Stuck In Life"

    • Wael Kaheel

      Hey Sidz, thank you for taking the time to create and sharing this valuable broadcast.
      One of the most biggest common is defiantly the fear and i love how you dressed the
      way to overcome it. God bless

      • Siddharth Rajsekar

        Thanks Wael!

        • Imtiaz

          Thats really best audio.

        • Ramya Sundar

          #ILH Deep learner

          Stinking thinking – Patterns – Binds into mediocrity. Stuck in income, relationship and health.

          1. Fear – Fear of unknown (insecure feel about tomorrow), fear of failure, fear of success
          Keep your mind positive & DO IT ANYWAY!
          2. Conformity – People pleaser – Win beneath the wings. Want to be good for everybody and being a doormat. What will others think about me? In Beta mode
          Speak up your emotions in a nice way where they won’t get hurt!
          3. Blaming Others – This negative emotion consumes you! Blaming is correlated to ENTITLEMENT! It is a relationship issue!
          Give your love! If not atleast Bless them! Look at them as a cause of the lesson than thinking them as a cause of pain
          4. Previous conditioning – Be conscious about the previous conditioning that is keeping you stuck! What is it that as a child you have been conditioned with that’s keeping you stuck!
          What’s your world view with respect to money, people, life, spirituality, success?
          5. Family & friends – People you are closest with may not want you to change as it may question the status quo! Evolution is good and needed! When we give in for the discouragement that we receive from our close ones, it means that we seek their approval. This may or may not help us all the times.
          Its ok to step out of the approval zone!
          6. Rigid thinking – Its either may way or the highway! Be rigid on your goal and flexible on how you get there! Be flexible like a Bamboo tree which flows along with the wind during a storm, rigid trees will easily be blown away!
          Be rigid on your values but the way it can be approached can be flexible. When you are fixed in your vision, goals and values, you will be able to live a flexible life
          7. Not having clear goals – Living an Ad hoc life. When you do not have an aim, the possibility of you reaching the destination is very less!
          When you set out on a journey, always set the destination first. Routes may change but there is always a high chance that you will reach your destination! Have a clear goal
          8. Resentment – Bitter indignation of having treated unfairly! Feeling of world is bad/world is unjust! There is some purpose for our life and there is always a better destination to reach!
          Keenly observe your self-talk to check if you have already such negative feeling towards life! We attract people with the same Vibe. Once we come out of such negative reinforcements, we can start attracting good people, fair world and abundance! Positive subconscious mindset will help us in moving forward
          9. Bad attitude – Putting people down, Despising people etc. When we spend a few minutes with a person if we feel Energy infused – their attitude is good and if you feel energy is drained – their attitude is not so good!
          Be mindful about adding value to someone’s life every time you have a conversation
          10. Ego – It’s the person’s sense of self-esteem and self-importance. There is good ego and false ego. False ego means thinking that a person is the doer & sole purpose for everyone around us!
          Good ego – Understanding that we are only instruments for what happens around us and we are here only to serve other. The more we serve, the more we are able to lead & impact people’s lives.
          11. Not learning – Entropy – Lack of order or predictability over time – Entropy is a law of universe. As long as we are learning & growing deterioration does not happen. If we do not do or learn anything it is a downward spiral.
          When we are in constant state of moving forward and making things happen we can go against the law of entropy

        • Arabinda kumar sahu

          My learnings from this podcast are the following

          we have fear of anything but we should do the work any cost.

          nobody in this world is perfact.so at least try to give your best then you will be automatically perfact.

          For your any situation naver blame to anyone, always try to move on that good/bad situation. Take your own responsibility

          never ever attached to any situation which was in the past.try to focus on your present moment.

          listen to everyone but try to listen to your won heart for better results

          be fixed on your goal but be flexible on your way or method to achieving
          your goal.

          We should have the clarity of our goal

          Try to be honest yourself and with others
          Anger management is the right key of success.
          Treat others as you want for yourself.

          Never ever try try share any negativity to anyone

          Always try to serve the people don’t think that I am the only one who solve anything.Be humble and serve to the people

          Without learning we can’t achive anything.so continuous learning, improvement is necessary to be successful in life .

          Do something with certainty for achieving goal.

      • vivek Sharma

        Thanks a lot for for this podcast Sid. To be frank after listening to this podcast I am now thinking to keep away from couple of my friends who are always negative in their life. Thank you once again for this podcast.

    • Himanshu

      Hey, Sid.
      What a fantastic podcast.
      Personally, I think old conditioning and upbringing has a massive impact on our life. I could totally relate with it.
      Thank you so much for such an amazing value-packed session

    • Sunil Lobo Prabhu

      Your podcast resonated with me because of 2 attributes which I have been carrying like a “cross” since many years. Though my eyes have opened up to the real world I would have been glad if someone had pointed out this to me long ago like your podcast.

      • Siddharth Rajsekar

        Great to know Sunil! I’m glad you heard the whole podcast and got your takeaway!

    • Mohan Babu

      Made very easy and simple to understand ???? the 11 dangerous attributes,

      to get break through, in once life.

    • Mohan Babu

      Made very easy to understand,
      I personally resonate with the content,
      Thanks for creating a great podcast.

    • Imtiaz

      Thats really best audio.
      I have learnt these all things in “Landmark Education Forum” way back 20 years.

    • Rachna

      Hey Sidz, I m moving out of zone of people pleaser and ready to build my own aeroplane to fly on my journey. I feel ventilated with this podcast. I hope I’ll be able to transfer same aura of positive energy in my videos while watching your videos. Thank you for being a Responsible Mentor.

    • Prashant Raj

      Hi Sidz,

      First of all, Thank you so much for creating such a wonderful podcast.

      Your 11 Attributes are a game-changer for anyone who “stuck-up in life and no matter what”.

      I love the way you speak, explain and most important your content!! Also, I have forwarded this link to my selected family and friends get benefited from this.

      Pl, keep creating this kind of podcast and wish you all the best!

    • Prashant LK

      Awesome information Sidz. Started 2020 with useful knowledge. Thanks

    • Ankit

      Awesome podcast… Lot of attributes quiet similar to me… I also fear change, blame odrs, etc… But now I will improve myself and bring out d best version of myself.. Thank you sir… U r just awesome????✊????????

    • Praveen Pal

      THANK YOU SIR

    • Varun Dev

      Really loved the stuff. I think everyone should hear this

    • SUMESH CHHABRIA

      I have experienced this in my life especially seeking approval. Superb and very meaningful podcast 🙂 🙂

    • Devulapalli Karuna

      Yes siddharth, I resonate myself not having a clear goal, lost in the daily routine life and resentment. Now my looking towards world has changed .Thankyou so much, I share these with my friends n close ones, take care n hope ur mission be fulfilled

    • Rahul

      Awesome podcast. Superfan of you. Every aspect was loud and clear. Learnt a lot. Thanks.

    • Akshay

      The thing is we don’t actually realize that we are living with these attributes!
      This podcast has done a #1 job of awareness.
      I believe once we’re aware of these attributes, change will happen!

    • Dr Aleem

      Great one sid. The bonus one is Speaking more than listening. Allowing others more than yourself

    • Dinesh Kunder

      Thanks a lot for valuable podcast sidz, lot things opened up, I am from ur community but I have not take any action and not set any goal, today onwards I will take action, I will complete the things which are incomplete, I was in the listening of no time, busy, once again thanks a lot.

    • Prady

      This is simply amazing. Thanks so much Siddharth 🙂

    • Srinivasulu Dasam

      Hello Siddarth,
      I listened to your podcast. I understand how to overcome situations when we are stuck. Positive and a strong mind will allow us to progress in right direction. Being spiritual and meditating will definitely have a better control of mind and balance. Very nice podcast. Like to hear couple of times . Share with others friends too.
      Thanks,
      Srinivasulu Dasam

    • Srinivasulu Dasam

      Hello Siddarth,
      I was a very useful and informative podcast. All attributes was explained in detail. I will follow these going forward , you shared your personal development view points really god. We need to always lead our life for a distinct purpose. Spiritual and meditation will always leads a great balance life. Thanks for your clean presentation.

    • Mangalalaxmi

      Thank you so much Sid. It was a awesome podcast. I actually learnt the 11 dangerous attributes , out of which few were which I had and which was stopping me. But now I realised and will work on it to become successful soon. Thank you. Looking forward for more of these.

    • Prince Saroj Kumar Panda

      Throughout the podcast I felt like u were speaking directly to me.

      Really motivated by ur ideas, Sir.

      God Bless u Health, Wealth and all the Happiness..????????❤️

      I pray the almighty to give me strength to break my own cage.

      OMM ????

    • DIBYENDU DUTTA

      Very well explained. Fear is definitely the biggest of them all and as I analyse I find it has also resides in the other ten. So to tackle this first and the biggest mind-block I believe I have to start at No.11 – learning first to unlearn my bad habits and then replace each with a new progressive one.
      Thank you very much, SR, for putting it all together for us.

    • Ganesha KR

      Hi Sidz
      11 dangerous things in life are very meaningful I am really proud be like a student with you and I am promising you, will do something best in life.

    • Nickyta Chaurasiya

      Really insightful, as you had fear of success. I guess fear of failure is the point where I am stuck. Also first time now m clear about conformity.

    • Payal Talekar

      This was very informative podcast. The biggest takeaway for me was fear. The fear of failure and the self doubt that whether I am good enough keep me stuck. I am working on breaking this. Want to hear more deep stuff on this, Thankyou for sharing your knowledge.

    • Sangeeta Naik

      Hi Sidz,
      I was taking a fresh look at how you organized the podcast in the blog.
      However, I took your perspective of being flexible about how things are going to unfold.. this message is hitting me repeatedly over last few days. However, being on the action side, I also have experienced new vistas opening up.
      Very interesting journey being part of the community

    • Rajveer Kaur

      Great deal of knowledge and wisdom I have received through this podcast. The 11 attributes shared here are just amazing. I always have been working towards these but I was always feeling as if I was doing something wrong by not obeying to other people and after listening to this podcast today I am feeling guided and relieved.
      It is actually very important to recognise our fears, get rid of conformity, stopping blaming others, not being affected by our previous conditioning, not taking every advice from family and friends, having flexibility in our methods, having clearly defined goals, leaving all the resentment, carrying a good attitude, leaving false ego and keep learning and evolving. If anyone follows this he/she can reach any point in this world. Thank you so much for sharing this podcast.
      #ILHfamily #deeplearner

    • Sujaya

      11 Dangerous attributes that keep people stuck in life.

      Not just going to be theory. It is for you to implement, take action and get out of the ‘being stuck’ phase.

      Being stuck could happen in any or many areas of life life relations, finance, career etc. mostly because of the stinking thinking.

      There are some patterns that keep people bound to scarcity or some kind of lack that causes the stuck-ness and makes them live with it.

      The following are the 11 attributes and take action to unlock your true potential.

      1) FEAR
      Fear could be fear of failure, fear of unknown, fear of success

      Fear of failure happens when you had a failure or a negative situation and you cannot confront it again and you keep thinking that even if you this you will end up failing.

      Fear of unknown means you do not know what is going to happen and you live in that fear of ‘What might happen if I do this?’. Having a spiritual ritual helps to get over this part of fear of unknown.

      Fear of success could come from one of the patterns that you have seen in your close relations. May be you associate success with eventual downfall. This kind of thinking that becoming too successful will create a downfall.

      Solution:

      Do it any way
      Do not get into negative news be it newspaper or social media. Being mindful that you need not swim into the negativity that’s is going around.
      If there is something important just know it as important but you need not delve into it.

      You need to know that negativity causes fear.

      2) Conformity

      Conformity to others’ views or being a people pleaser. You tend to do all that pleases others.

      Yes there are people who love you but there is a fine line between real genuine love and you stepping into your own power and doing something of your own.

      When you are the doormat for everybody around, you lose your power.

      You are overwhelmed with thoughts like what will they think of me, will they approve me? makes you stuck in conformity.

      And, when you are stuck in conformity, you cannot even voice out what you have inside of you.

      Like a pressure cooker that releases all the pressure, there has to be a release of all the conformity within you.

      Solution:
      Just be straight, Talk straight.
      Its ok as long as the intent is good and you believe in what you are saying.
      It also not about putting others down, or bashing people.
      It’s like telling people its ok, doing it in a way that they also feel respected and you are not bound to them.

      3) Blaming others.
      Blaming is that you do when something happened and its always running in your mind.
      May be thinking this person is the cause of my downfall etc. etc.

      This blame actually consumes you.
      You end up losing out on the goodness that is there in your life.

      In a way, blame is also related to entitlement that is someone feels entitled to be treated in a certain way and then something that is expected does not happen and then follows with blame

      Not having a sense of entitlement helps in this case.

      Solution:
      Just giving your love
      There might be people to whom you may be thinking that you cannot give your love – like enemies.
      But, you can at least bless them. It’s like thinking – I thank you so much for what you have done, I wish the best for you but you are not in my life. Thank you so much.

      Instead of looking at them as a cause of the pain, you can look at them as a cause of your lesson and let go.

      It might be easy to say, but, good to be mindful that blaming is not going to help you or them.

      An example from the history is Yudishtara who is also known as Ajathashatru – one who’s enemy is not born. So he is the ideal person to model from the history.

      4) Previous Conditioning
      Previous conditioning is more to do with upbringing.
      specific things that you have been doing.
      Some patterns exist like – that’s how parents did, that’s how grand parents did – some might be positive, some negative.

      Conditioning is something that makes you do on a daily basis – become aware of what are some of those that make you stuck and get away from it.

      Previous Conditioning mostly has to do with world view like what do you think about having money? What do you think about life? or What do you think about people etc.

      5) Family & Friends
      This is a big one and you might not want to confront yourself.
      People who are the closest are the ones who do not want you to change because they may be afraid whether the relation will be effected if you change.

      The fact is if you do not evolve on a day to day basis , then you are dying.

      Evolution is good as long as you are doing with honor, respect and nobility.

      Yes, on the face value some people may look at the change as positive some other may look at it as negative, but, it is neither.

      You know that the intention is good, pure and not to pull anybody down.

      It’s like they just want you to be in the mold.

      Also, when someone questions and you start to doubt yourself – that will not make you grow.

      This may be called as poisoned love meaning always protecting so much that the other person is not growing.

      It might be true that they know you from years, from their view they are saying it with love but it is not allowing you to grow.

      solution:
      Step out of this zone of approval from your family and friends.

      And believe that close people who are pulling you down will end up applauding you when you become successful.

      So, just be cool.

      6) Rigid Thinking

      Thinking like it’s my way or the highway. It is important to be fixed on your vision but be flexible on how you get there.

      When the inverse happens, that is what makes you stuck.
      That is when goal is flexible and method is rigid. Being rigid – I need to do this in only this specific way.

      Example: bamboo tree is flexible while growing but is very strong and can actually sustain storms.

      This is more to do with what is your view on how your life should be.

      If you have this thinking that – this is the way you should be doing things on daily basis etc. etc., it drains your energy.

      You don’t have to follow exactly the way people used to be 100 or 200 years back.

      Coming to values, you can stand by your values.

      You can be rigid on the core principles & value system, but, you can be flexible on the way things go every day.

      Following values will help you be disciplined and help you live a flexible life.

      7) Not having clear goals

      This is more about taking life on a day to day basis, living an ad hoc life, having a lets see attitude or thinking ok, whatever happens happens, etc.

      In this case, listening to the audio strangest secret helps and the audio actually says this – the most unsuccessful people are those who do not have goals.

      So having a goal is mandatory. Something things that anchor you are writing 2 pages of goals everyday.

      It is like when you are not clear on what you want, you might as well go anywhere and that’s not a good place to go.

      And, when you are going out somewhere, you pick up google maps, you first set a destination and then get on the road.

      So, you need to know where you are going.

      8)Resentment

      The word resentment is closer to the word blame but a little different.
      The dictionary meaning is: bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly.

      It means having this kind of thinking like this is an unfair world, the world is bad, etc.

      If you have these thoughts, no matter what you do you will be stuck in life.

      When you are constantly putting effort but subconsciously you are thinking world is unfair, bad etc. the result does not come

      Scriptures always say that there is always a better destination to go.

      And, as long as you are in this plane, you need to make the best use of it.

      You are put on earth for a certain purpose, so you can make this journey an amazing by having a positive subconscious framework without having resentment.

      This is what is needed to move forward in life.

      9) Having a bad attitude
      It could be having all the elements above and even more.

      It might be putting people down or draining one’s energy.

      When you spend some time with someone and you walk away – are you walking away with energy sucked out of you, or energy is charged up? – This will give you an idea of how the attitude was.

      In some cases, may be what they say is nice, but once you leave their place, you tend to feel low.

      In other cases, with some people, what they say hurts you ,but when you walk away you actually feel good about yourself and you feel more determined to do something.

      You can check it yourself on how the other person feels when somebody comes to you and then leaves.

      When you are mindful that with every interaction you have you are adding value to the person and time, you can consciously inculcating a good attitude.

      10) Ego
      A person’s sense of self-esteem and self-importance.

      There are true ego, false ego & super ego.

      False ego is the kind of thinking when you consider yourself to be the doer etc.

      True ego is to understand your position in this universe and seeing yourself as just a servant.

      The more you serve the more you lead,
      The more you lead the more you impact other people’s lives.

      Super ego is more to do with super consciousness – ultimate, creator etc.

      False ego is something that keeps you stuck when you think you are ultimate goal of everyone’s life. It could be somebody who is having no ends about yourself.

      11) Not Learning
      If you are not learning, you are not growing and are automatically dying.

      All of us are in a constant state of entropy.
      Entropy is a lack of order or gradual decline to disorder. It is a natural law of universe that everything deteriorates – be it living thing or non-living thing.

      Entropy works by nature. As long as you are constantly learning and constantly moving ahead, it helps you from getting stuck.

      If you are not learning it is equivalent to standing on the downward escalator without doing anything and it is automatically taking you down.

      By learning, you can be in the constant state of moving forward and being in the constant state of making things happen.

      #ilhfamily
      #ilhdeeplearner

    • Sangeeta Naik

      #ihldeeplearner
      Another takeaway is to understand the variety of fears.
      Many do not share that they r stuck.
      Hiding behind other value systems.

      Conformity is a huge value system. The moment tbey are out of it, it seems to be regarding other people’s opinion as well as it will be about taking action..

      Fears again. Being a victim, helps them to be in self pity

    • Madhur

      Sharing my notes from this superb podcast:

      Stinking thinking pattern, avoid below 11 attitude:
      Scarcity mindset
      1.
      Fear of failure, fear of unknown, fear of success
      Solution “Do it anyway”
      Get out of negativity as soon as possible
      2.
      People pleasing attitude, conformity, not able to voice out
      Becoming Doormat, walked over by others, causes disturbance
      Solution
      Talk straight – politely, do it nicely but be clear

      3.
      Blaming others – that energy of blame consumes you
      Entitled people have huge demands – blame comes when expectations are not met
      Solution:
      Being respectful even to people who wrong you
      Just bless them even if they are enemies, thank them for giving you a lesson, as needed
      Blaming is not going to help you or them , so it’s a waste

      4.
      Conditioning – The beliefs at subconscious level – check for yourself,
      which ones are keeping you stuck
      E.g. Rich people may be wrong – this conditioning is not true and must be changed to become rich.
      Solution: Reframe limiting beliefs with true, empowering statements

      5. Family & friends –
      People who are closest to you don’t want you to change for their relationship.
      If you are not evolving you are dieing
      Intent is good so not to stop
      Friends may pull you back instead of approving your new change. This is poison love, as you don’t get your space to grow.
      Solution:
      It’s okay to come out of their approval requirement, as long as, you know you are on right path, and not doing amy harm to them.

      6.
      Rigidity –
      Its my way or highway,
      While goal is flexible, pathway to achieve is rigid, in few cases.
      Solution : Goal to be fixed , how you reach flexible
      You can be rigid on your chosen, top-priority, values.
      Discipline actually brings more freedom, over time.
      Check your rigid zones are re-evaluate, to make necessary change
      7.
      Not having clear goals – living an adhoc life.
      Most unsuccessful people are those who don’t have goals. They might go anywhere, and that’s not the best place to reach.
      People who have goals achieve.
      Solution: Have clear goals, reiterate them daily, write down and follow the direction

      8.
      Resentment
      Bitter indignation at being treated unfairly by others.
      If such beliefs exist at subconscious level, then you shall bring such situations in life.
      Solution:
      Forgive people , come out of belief that things cannot change.
      Find your lifestyle purpose. Remember, when there is some purpose to fulfil, that can make life so amazing.

      9.
      Bad attitude
      Putting people down, energy sucker attitude
      People who have great attitude, you shall feel good about yourself and determined to act after meeting them
      Solution- check for yourself if any aspect of your attitude has gone bad and work towards changing it. Become that bright energetic motivator for others and you shall be successful yourself.

      10.
      Ego – sense of self
      False ego vs. True ego
      If you are someone who has too high opinion or pride in yourself, that’s false and shall keep you stuck.
      Solution: Do self analysis , realise where ego is taking over because that’s harming you. Use support of spiritual healing or psychological exercises.
      Replace ego with self respect.

      11.
      Not Learning – its a downward escalator
      Constantly learning is essential to keep moving ahead.
      Solution: Find areas where you need to grow. Find high quality learning available and plan step by step to enhance your knowledge and take yourself to the next level.

    • Divya Abilash

      This was such an eye opener.. Now I really understand why I am so stuck in life!
      Fear- fear of the unknown, fear of failure and for me personally, fear of success is what is truly stopping me.. I fear of losing everything if I become successful.. But after listening to you, I have decided that I am going to do it anyway!
      Conformity- Stop conforming to other people’s views. Don’t be a people pleaser. Stop being the wind beneath other people’s wings. Its time to build your own aircraft and fly. Genuine family and friends will definitely fly with you.
      Blaming others- Keeping on blaming others for your downfall is ultimately going to consume you. Understand that they came into your life to teach you something worthwhile. Bless them and get into action to achieve your goal.
      Previous conditioning – Your upbringing may have exposed you to many positive and negative conditioning. Take in the positives and chuck out the negatives.
      Family and friends – parents constantly protect their children from the outside world and its harshness, but this is actually ‘poison love’. Because you are left defenseless when you step out on your own into the actual world.. So keep the advice of your loved ones in your mind, but face the world according to your gut and intuitions.
      Rigid thinking – be fixed on your goal, but be flexible on how u get there. ‘My way or highway’ attitude is not going to get you anywhere.
      Be rigid on your value system to achieve your goals
      Not having clear goals- Have a clear goal on where you want to reach.. There may be roadblocks and obstacles on your way.. But if you have your destination fixed, you will eventually reach there.
      Resentment – Having a positive subconscious framework without Resentment will help you reach your goal.
      Bad attitude – Putting people down or despising them, is not going to get you anywhere. Be mindful to add value to every person you meet.
      Ego- False ego takes you nowhere. If you understand that you are put here on this earth for service then you wil always find success.
      Not Learning – Do not be in a state of entropy. Keep learning constantly to keep moving forward..

      So Beware of these Dangerous Attributes and Don’t get Stuck!

      Great enlightenment Sir.

      #ilhdeeplearner

    • Anuradha Bansal

      Hey Sid
      Really thought provoking.
      My learnings, few things which hold a person back in life are
      1. Fear of unknown. It might be the fear of failure or success based on one’s life experiences. I too am suffering from fear of failure. As suggested by you, I promise myself mindfulness, positive mindset & Do It Anyway attitude
      2. Conformity. As Earl Nightingale says “in today’s world, opposite of courage is conformity. To succeed, don’t conform, create.”
      3. Blame game. Stop blaming your enemies. Let go. Bless them, help your mind get rid of them.
      4. Sometimes, family and friends get overprotective & unknowingly hold u back. Look ahead, have a clear vision & try not to seek approval in everything u do .
      5. Rigid thinking. Be rigid towards your goal but flexible in ur approach.
      6. Previous conditioning . Let go of past, look ahead.
      7. Have a clear goal.
      8. Rise above your false ego & narrow minded pettiness
      9. Lack of learning. Always be ready to learn, unlearn & relearn.
      Thanks for the bulb on moment
      #ilhdeeplearner #icancoach #youcancoach #ilhsociety

    • Lalit Hundalani

      #ilhfamily #deeplearner

      Another fantastic podcast by Sidz, where he talks about the reasons which keep most of us stuck in life. The learnings are based on his personal experiences before he ventured into the personal development world and overcame these hurdles to emerge as SIDZ 2.0.

      Sharing my takeaways from this 29 minutes long podcast, with the intent that it will act as QSR (Quick Short Read)for the learners who are hard-pressed for time. How successful I have been in my endeavor will be decided by your feedback, which will act as a compass for my future sojourns.

      Ok so here are the 11 common traits, & cures, as enumerated by SIDZ:

      1.Fear

      Cause: Fear of repeating past failures, the unfavorable outcomes of past success, or fear of the unknown.

      Symptom: The mind keeps traveling into past events and situations in our life when things didn’t work out the way we wanted them to. Every time an opportunity comes your way, the brain travels back to the stack of earlier similar incidents and keeps throwing the unfavorable outcomes.

      Effect: Perennial state of inaction owing to fear.

      Cure: Having a spiritual grounding and doing stuff like meditation, mindfulness helps in making you strong enough to overcome it. Having a positive mindset keeps you on track. Limiting the consumption of unwanted content, negative news from various sources also helps in eliminating fear.
      Remember, we can’t know everything and we should not know everything. Sometimes ignorance is also bliss as it opens up the mind to endless possibilities without imposing any limitations.

      2.Conformity

      Cause: Confirming the wishes of others & behave in a way that is expected by others.

      Symptoms: Don’t want to hurt anyone. Trying to come across as Mr.Nice to everyone with an objective of being loved and appreciated. Living life according to the wishes of others rather than doing what you love to do. It also leads to scenarios where you tolerate wrong things, wrong person, wrong events just to avoid being come across as inappropriate as it might hurt your image. It is one the of the severe diseases, as rightly mentioned by someone in Hindi, “Duniya ka sabse bada rog, kya kahenge log”

      Effect: You become a people pleaser. Over a period of time, you tend to lose your individuality and start feeling awful. People take you for granted, you fail to prioritize what matters for you and stop progressing in life. The inability to voice out your opinion and pent-up emotions might culminate in the situation of depression and anxiety.

      Cure: Become assertive & straight talker.No harm in calling spade a spade, if that’s how it is. You don’t need to be arrogant but firm in your opinion, this will others to rectify themselves, in case they are doing it wrong. For diplomats, it will be initially difficult but gradually they get used to it. Others might be shocked and surprised at the change of guard but will thank you in long term. For those whom you really matter and those who matter to you will stick through, unwanted people will be flushed out from your life.

      3.Blaming others

      Cause: Essentially holding others responsible for your failures or the situation you are in.

      Symptoms: Past incidents or events keep on playing in your head in a loop, where you see how you were wronged by someone..You tend to play the victim card so that you get more self-love. It also creates the sense of entitlement, where you feel that you deserve to be treated in a certain way and you must get certain things, which is not correct.It is more of a relationship issue.

      Effect: You shun the ownership and responsibility of your actions & stop working in the right direction.

      Cure: Give love and blessings to the people who might have wronged you & move on. Even if you consider them as their enemies, thank them for teaching a valuable life lesson and close the chapter then and there. Once you do that you are able to come out of the endless loop and start moving forward. A case in point for demonstrating such behavior is by Yudhishter from Mahabarata who had no enemies and was fair & just, even with those who wronged him repeatedly.

      4.Previous Conditioning

      Cause: The way you have been living your life till now.The way you have been brought up, conditions your mind in a certain way.

      Symptoms: Conditioning can be positive or negative. It shapes our worldview of the lens through which we see life. For example, you might see the rich & successful people in a different light focusing on not-so-good things about them instead of all that’s good. The sad part is that most of the time we are not even aware of this conditioning.

      Effect: This seriously hampers your progress & limits the mind for even aspiring for success. Unless the mindset is aligned, things don’t happen.

      Cure: Going through the journey of personal development makes you aware of these things. Right mentors help you know, what you don’t know. Once you become aware, the coding of the brain can be changed so that it aligns with your outcomes.

      5.Family & Friends

      Cause: People closest to you, don’t want you to change. They fear that a change in the status quo will hurt the relationship.

      Symptoms: Family and close friends have got used to seeing in a particular way and when you try to do anything which is different from obvious there is an element of shock & resistance. You come across questions like, “what’s happened to you ?”, “You have changed” etc. Such interactions make you think twice and at times retract your steps.

      Effect: It creates a situation of Poisoned Love. You don’t get your space and there is a tendency to seek approval for everything, which delays the process of transformation & you stop evolving as an individual.

      Cure: Respect loved ones but set boundaries and stop seeking validation for every single thing. Once you know what needs to be done, just do it. At times initial resistance from closed ones transitions into applause later, so be cool about it.

      6.Rigid Thinking

      Cause: My way or the highway approach. There is an adamant approach in doing things in a particular way, which keeps most of the people stuck.

      Symptoms: It is contrary to the maxim of fixed goals and flexible means. People in this state are fixed in their approach and keep shifting the goalposts.
      For example, our lifestyle should change in accordance with changing environment.

      Effect: If companies like NOKIA which were once the market leaders, disappeared as they were either slow or refused to change, the juxtaposition on individuals is quite obvious.

      Cure: Be adaptive to change. Remember, “change is the only constant”.When covid struck, people who were quick to adapt the business model to changing dynamics reaped the benefits and made moolah while those who didn’t struggle big time.

      7.Not having Clear Goals

      Cause: Lack of clarity about what do you want to achieve? Lack of vision.

      Symptoms: Going with the flow, surviving till another day.” Chalta hai” attitude. The most unsuccessful people are those who don’t have goals.

      Effects: The absence of a destination leads you to the land of nowhere. So either you end up going in circles or reach a place where you don’t want to. That’s exactly what happens with people without goals.

      Cure: Have short-term, mid-term, and long-term goals which you can pursue relentlessly.Set goals that can make you jump out of the bed every morning.

      8.Resentment

      Cause: It’s similar to blame but more potent. Here you start blaming the world as unjust and unfair.

      Symptom: When we start thinking at a subconscious level that everything is bad, then invariably we tend to attract the not-so-good things. The more you curse, the more you attract the misfortune.

      Effect: If you have already concluded in your head that everything is bad then no matter what, good things are not gonna happen to you for sure.

      Cure: Make the most of every day. Be grateful for being alive if not anything else. Show gratitude for all the blessings in life, this will create positive energy and give you the enthusiasm to carry on.

      9.Bad Attitude

      Cause: Superiority complex and looking down at others.

      Symptom: The best way to know whether the person is having a bad attitude or not is the feeling you get. A feeling of exhaustion and sucking out of energy is an indicator of a negative attitude. More often than not we know how do we behave & how others think about our attitude.

      Effect: Toxic attitude is detrimental to growth & pushes you backward.

      Cure: Try to add value and adopt the right attitude. It doesn’t mean you have played Mr.Nice every time. You can be a simple, straight talker with the right attitude. The tone matters more than the words.

      10.Ego

      Cause: A high sense of self-esteem or self-importance.

      Symptom: Considering self in high regards and to be a person with utmost capabilities and looking down on others.

      Effect: Restricts the learning curve, since you consider yourself to be all-knowing. Once you stop learning, you stop evolving and stagnate.

      Cure: Consider yourself to be a mere speck in this whole universe. Once you become conscious of this thing, that mere thought should deflate your ego. Realize your purpose in life and be dedicated towards fulfillment of the purpose & serving others.

      11.Not learning

      Cause: Feeling of, knowing it all what’s important.

      Symptoms: Wasting time in entertainment & vices rather than self-education. Not doing anything is a journey to a downward spiral.

      Effect: We are in a state of entropy. Everything in the world deteriorates over time so if are not learning we are dying.

      Cure: Continuous learning and upgrading ourselves to remain relevant in the changing dynamics .

      With this we come to the end of this post, pls share your views on this transcription. Suggestions for improvement are most welcome.

      Cheers

      #ilhdeeplearner

    • Sidz you know what these words/ phrases that you mentioned as attributes are soo easily and lightly talked/gossiped about when it comes to judging OTHERS and not ourselves.

      I’ve come to a realization that every human being has all these attributes in them. What we need to do is first analyze and introspect on our own personal development rather than focusing on aligning others. As the Flight attendants say- “Wear your mask first before you assist others!”

      After listening to this, my takeaway would be to motivate myself to conquer my fears, don’t give in to conformity, stop blaming others for my feelings, let go of negative past conditionings, evolve myself beyond my family’s perceptions, be fixed on my clear goals and flexile on my tools, staying away from resentment, treating people with harmony, have a true ego and keep learning!

      I stopped educating and evolving myself professionally after getting my first job as I thought that can be done only if I go for another degree. After 10 years, It feels great to be back on track and find the purpose of life with the help of mentors like you!

      Thank you Sidz! I’m a #ILHDEEPLEARNER of #ILHFAMILY and a proud changemaker!

    • Manissh Ahuuja

      These 29 mins of pearls of unadulterated wisdom can help someone clear tons of mental blocks and can definitely result in them un-caging their problems and unlocking their self discovery journey.

      Following 11 negative attributes cause most of our emotional problems that also manifest in real world issues and challenges.

      Attribute 01 – Fear

      – – Fear of the Unknown keeps you stuck and demotivates you from putting in the necessary efforts.

      – – Fear of success stops you from taking actions, despite having the skills and the knowledge

      – – Fear of Failure makes you overthink and stops you from acting which causes you to get into the zone of self-doubt.

      Attribute 02 – Conformity

      – – Conformity keeps you in your comfort zone, but your comfort zone will never allow you to flourish/ unlock your true potential.

      – – The ship is the safest at the bay, but that’s not the reason why it was built.  You need to learn to be mindful, assertive and fulfil your true purpose in life.

      Attribute 03 – Blaming Others

      – – Blaming Others may come as an attribute of your attitude, your thought process, and even your entitlement.

      – – People who go through bad experiences can tend to get in the zone of being stationary, because they expend their energy wallowing in their past failures, or blaming people who have disappointed them.

      – – Shower people with love, and positive vibes, especially if they’re the cause of difficult situations, in your life. Everyone comes to your life to teach you a lesson, and not to make your life hell. We just have to learn to be more mindful in anyway possible.

      Attribute 04 – Previous Conditioning

      – – Be aware of your existing conditioning patterns. Your upbringing and your past experiences subconsciously creates the coding that’s keeping you in the loop of stagnancy.

      – – Breakthrough and create your rules, your understanding and definitions of success and failures.

      Attribute 05 – Family and Friends

      – – Your loved ones are your comfort zone, and they may not want you to change.

      – – You don’t need to change, you need to learn how you wish to evolve.

      – – If your vision is right, and if you aren’t hurting anybody, don’t look for validation/ approval from your family and friends. Eliminate the “poison love” from your family and friends.

      Attribute 06 – Rigid Thinking

      – – Be Fixed On Your Goals, Be Flexible On The Methods.

      – – Get inspired by the bamboo tree. Your values (roots) must define your path, and not your pace of movement. Life will always bring you harsh winds, but your roots will keep your structure in place.

      Attribute 07 – Unclear goals

      – – Clarity of goals will get you the direction of your efforts.

      – – Set the destination, and walk towards the goal.

      Attribute 08 – Resentment

      – – The world isn’t bad/ unfair/ unjust. Your past experiences don’t determine the rest of your journey.

      – – Freeing yourself from negativity will reveal your true purpose and the framework towards happiness and success.

      Attribute 09 – Bad Attitude

      – – Be someone who adds to the energy at the end of the conversation.

      – – Be conscious about adding value in every conversation.

      Attribute 10 – Ego

      – – A False ego is a mirage. It only fuels your downfall and causes you to deteriorate on the inside.

      – – A true ego teaches you that the true purpose of your existence is to serve.

      – – Super Ego is your true compass and shows you the right direction and helps you achieve your spiritual purpose.

      Attribute 11 – Not Learning

      – – Learning delays your entropy

      – – Learning keeps you ahead of the curve

      – – Not learning is like being on the elevator on the way down.

      #ilhdeeplearner #icancoach #youcancoach #ilhsociety

    • Satish Shaw

      Fear – i feel fear as my wife is so possessive that fear has built in my mind
      Confirmity- currently i dont think what other people think
      Blaming – Now i have taken all responsibility without uttering a word of blaming
      Previous conditioning- i have failed many times in my life and changed many courses
      Family and friends – My own brother want me to stuck in my carrer
      Rigid thinking- I think i am flexible on the path to success
      No definite goals – i have my clear goal to teach maths with helping students to choose correct path
      resentment -Now i dont think anything bad about others . i see positive in others life
      Bad attitude – i respect each and every living and non living things
      Ego – i dont have ego
      Entrophy

    • Suraj Kumar A S

      Great Sidz, I think I needed this podcast at this point and would like to state my wonderful learrning from this audio resources

      1) Fear:- It can be fear of success or failure to confront the same situation we had experienced in past
      the only solution is by doing the thing anyway, this will help me overcome the fear and be mindful & focused on the reason why I started in the first place.

      2) Conformity:- Means people pleaser or going with what others say about our life, not able to voice out our own feeling in front of others
      The solution would be to find the fine line to keep the opinion to others, be straight but polite mannaer and decide for ourself whats best for us.

      3) Blaming game:- Always been stuck the loop of blaming others for my own downfalls, finding out reason that points fingers away from myself to others / their doing has effected my life or success or base platform. Blaming also has correlation to entilements as I deserve this but bcz of you/xyz/him/her it never happened, hence am stuck here.
      Solution is to give your love or bless them if you cant give them your love directly, this help us change our mindset of understanding they happened to us to teach us some lesson.

      4) Previous Conditing:- Means we are tuned to do something in a certain way without knowing whether is good or bad by our care takers or parents or grandparents. We need to understand that conditioning can positive or negative conditioning by attending personal development program or been open to ideas of improvement or observing successfull person on their habit.

      5) Family & friends:- They dont mean harm to you but they dont want to us to change bcz they fear that we may change the status quo of the relation we have wiith them. Inshort they dont want us to loose us ( which they wont but thats their fear, out of love for us). We all need to evolve but in nice, positive, respectful intentions
      Solution is to trust ourself and stop getting approval from others whom we love, their opinion can be posion love for us in our current situations. We are the best author of our life story, others are just characters supporting of life story.

      6) Rigid Thinking:- Like its MY WAY or HIGHWAY, or be fixed on something has to happen in certain way you like. We need to remember that rigid trees get uprooted first when strom hits. Practially, we should be fixed on your destination but be flexible on how to reach there. But that doesnt me you have to compramise with your principles.

      7) Not having Clear Goals:- Easy goer or will think what happen tomorrow as and when it happens, that never help us to reach somewhere as we may not have goals to work upon. Its like GMaps, where we put our destination first & then follow thhe directions which changes (flexible) as per the road blocks to help us reach our destinations.

      8) Recentment:- Its experincing bitterness bcz something bad happens to us, bcz once we do that our mindset get fixed to our subconcious mind for life. This always pull us back to do something good for us or other,
      The solution is to have a positive mindset to understand our purpose for life, this helps us to uderstand that each step process we have gone through is something for us to learn, which imprints our subconciouss mind into learning path.

      9)Bad Attitude:- All these elements make us start putting people down or demotivate them or create a energy vacuum for them, thats negative or bad attitude. At this state of mind even if we say someting good, people take that as negative statement.

      10) Ego:- Self explanatry, but ego means good or bad ego & we generalise BAD EGO as EGO itself. And this bad ego push us away from our greatness. We need to have good ego so that our Super Ego is reinforced in positve manner.

      11) Not learning:- Yes, not learnong means dying, or enthrophy- means over a period time things get detorating. Infact not doing anything downfall of oneself.

      #ILHDEEPLEARNER of #ILHFAMILY

    • Megha Lodha

      Below mentioned is my learning for the excellent podcast. Following are the attributes that are bottleneck towards your success:
      1. Fear – Fear leads to failure. It makes your mind less stable and cease your path to success.
      2. Making every one happy: You are not on this planet to please and make every one happy. Don’t be a ppl pleasure. Be straight and behave in your original way.
      3. Set goals: as per earnst nightingale main reason to fail is we don’t have any goal to achieve. We are living without any goal. To become successful start setting goal and take actions to achieve them.
      4. Relationship: If you change your self its very difficult to digest by your loved ones. Don’t make your relationship acting a poison towards your path to success. Because your ppl know you from years and there feedback may distract you from your goal.
      5. Don’t be rigid: be flexible on doing all the activities to achieve your goals. Be stubborn on ethical things like no smoking, drinking, eating nonveg etc.
      6. Keep learning : Always learn something and make your inner self grow.
      7. Don’t be egoistic. Be calm and available when there is need.
      8. No resentment: Don’t engage your mind with negative feelings. Be optimistic and move on.
      9. Don’t keep bad attitude towards anything.
      10. No blame game. Take responsibility of everything you do!!

    • ROHITH SHASHISHEKAR

      I learnt to speak straight and overcome conformity.

    • Rahul Dev Chittoria

      #ilhdeeplearner
      Dear Sidz, You have done a threadbare analysis and reached the pulse of the issue
      ( confronted by one and all in one way or the other) ,in the right earnest through this invaluable podcast. Your positive vibes have touched on a subliminal level as always. I have evolved on this thought process as my takeaways from your podcast :
      Renewal ( to positivity and progress in life ) requires opening up yourself upto new ways of thinking and feeling. With this positive mindset as your arsenal to be nurtured at all times , even when the world throws its worst and then turns its back, there is still always hope of bouncing back with the resilience basis summoning reserves of energy from the positive mindset you have at your command n disposal…..

      Another thing which crossed my mind was that every individual in this world passes invariably through negativity and negative circumstances at respective points in their life . The point here is that each time this happens ( and I read it somewhere too, which I quote here) : A person in negative situation or circumstances goes invariably through DABDA ( Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance) . There is no escape to it, however with the positive mindset nurtured, as described above, one can sift through the stages of DABDA quickly acquired out of the negative situation or circumstance and literally get them flushed out of the thought process n mind to again be at peace and cordiality with the surroundings and people . The more you dwell for a much more longer time on DABDA on an negative situation you confront, it can subsequently lead to many psychosomatic disorders n ailments too causing a lot of torment n harm.

      Thanks again , Sidz for influencing our thought process and awareness towards the vices which hold us all back in life from progressing ahead. MPTY… looking forward to much more enlightening podcasts from yourself…..

    • Mayur Bhorunde

      Stinking Thinking – It has Deep Thought in itself.
      Personal Development Helps
      11 attribute to unlock

      1. FEAR # Failure/Success/ Unknown
      Solution # Spiritual Connect / Stay away from Negative news / Be Mindful about negativity
      2. CONFORMITY # Confirming to other people views/People Pleaser/ Perfectionism
      Solution # Speak Straight.
      3. BLAMING OTHERS # Blaming others as Cause of your problems/ Sense of entitlement
      Solution # Bless rather than Blame
      4. PREVIOUS CONDITIONING # Upbringing Pattern ( Positive/ Negative )/World View
      5. FAMILY & FRIENDS # Their Approval Seeking Process becomes poison love unintentionally
      6. RIGID THINKING # BE Fixed on your Goal but be Flexible on way of getting there
      7. NOT HAVING CLEAR GOALS # Living Adhoc Life without goals
      8. RESENTMENT # Bitter indignations of having treated unfairly, Looking world as Bad
      9. BAD ATTITUDE # Putting people down.
      10.EGO # Persons sense of self esteem – False Ego
      11.NOT LEARNING # Automode of Dieing .Gradual decline disorder.

      #ilhdeeplearner
      #YouCanCoach

    • Radhika

      Here’s what resonated with me the most:

      – fear of unknown
      – be mindful of negativity – stay away from any kind of negativity
      – don’t care about people who don’t care about you
      – childhood conditioning – get rid of the incorrect conditioning
      – poison – people are comfortable to dominate you so don’t want you to change or grow

      #ilhdeeplearner

    • Shweta Priyadarshini

      Hey Sidz
      Really need to remind myself of these again as I am stuck at not taking the required step
      My learnings,
      1. Fear of unknown/success /Failure . Fear is what keeps us stuck and stops us from taking actions . Face your fears and still move ahead of it .recommended steps – mindfulness, positive mindset & spiritual practices .
      I have the fear of success that it can be safety threat for my loved ones
      2. Conformity. In strangest secret As Earl Nightingale says “in today’s world, opposite of courage is conformity so instead of being a people pleasure or being treated like a doormat one has to take a stand . Being straight doesn’t mean being rude , its more of putting your point across and following it correctly.
      3. Blame game. Blaming leads to entitlement . Its creates lots of negativity . SO we should accept and thank that person even mentally and move one taking responsibility for our actions. We have to remember RESPONSE – Ability .
      4.Previous conditioning – conditioning influences our opinion about life about money about situations etc. .e.g. in my early childhood around age 5-6 as the effect of watching movies i decided i will not do business as it will get bankrupt and I will loose money . IN fact i realized this limiting believe while listening to Steve Jones audios and it has worked to get me to business mindset .Though I am stuck at some other points .
      5. family and friends get overprotective and caring because they want us to be safe and unhurt .Solution – we have to take our decision and work on achieving what we are committed to .
      6. Rigid thinking- My way or Highway thinking is not supportive . It leads to being stuck . SO we should be fixed towards goal but flexible in the method to achieve that . Things don’t always need to happen in particular way .There can be n number ways to achieve a task.
      7. Not having clear goals – A ship without a destination will sink or land in deserted island sooner or later .Similarly , having clear goals gives our mind the task to work upon consciously and subconsciously.
      8. Resentment – Having bitterness at subconscious level can sabotage your efforts .If we think world is bad place and everyone is bad , we will never progress or be prosperous .
      9.Bad Attitude – Having a bad attitude can be energy draining for us .SO we have to choose wisely where we spend our time . Are we with energy infusers or energy suckers ? At personal level i have some struggles here because all efforts i put to improve my balance and weekly once i have to be at a place where energy is so negatively influenced .
      10.EGO – Rise above your false ego and don’t consider yourself center of the universe . super ego is more of connecting with supreme. so work as we are at service to others and be positive and consider yourself as a medium to do good .
      11. Lack of learning. – If we are not learning we are dying . learning activates our brain and gives us lots of scope for improvement . Learn , unlearn , learn

      #ilhdeeplearner

    • HEMANT GAJBHIYE

      What I have learned from this Podcast is there are 11 Attributes which keeps people stuck in their life:

      1. Fear: Fear of unknown, fear of failure or fear of success.

      2. Conformity: Pleasing everybody, confirming others views, not being straight with others.

      3. Blaming Others: Usually, when people avoid responsibility then blame others for their misfortune.

      4. Previous Conditioning: Childhood conditioning, belief systems. Following something what your parents believe in.

      5. Family & Friends: People who are closest to you are not in favors of you getting changed, also seeking approval from family & friends.

      6. Rigid Thinking: It’s kind of ‘Righteousness’, being right all the time.
      “My way or Highway” thinking. Not being fixed on any goal.
      Here goals are flexible and ways to achieve those goals are fixed.

      But, rigid thinking is very much different from following the right value system. For example, not lying, not stealing, not drinking alcoholic beverages or smoking, not having extra marital affairs, and any harm to the animals.
      All these good value systems had been told by Siddhartha Gautama Buddha before 2500AD. These value systems are immutable & immortal in nature.

      7. Not Having Clear Goals: Living a life of ad hock. Most unsuccessful people are those who don’t have goals.

      8. Resentment: Victimizing yourself when anything bad happens to you, a feeling that there is an injustice with you.

      9. Bad Attitude: When you meet such people you don’t like them even though they talk good. When you leave anyone with bad attitude, you get infused with negative mindset. They suck your energy & power.

      10. Ego: Having false ego about own achievements.
      There are three more types of ego- Good Ego, Bad Ego & Super Ego

      11. Not Learning: If you are not learning, then you are dying. You should be a Life Long Learner.

      #ilhdeeplearner
      #ilhfamily

    • Raja N

      Sidz,
      The 11 steps you have mentioned is what I have gone thru and even going thru even today on my journey of transformation.

      Goal Setting give anybody a greatest power to change the thinking the moment they starts writing.
      Being Rigid, the more time you be in that situation you are getting weaker.

      Thank you for your inspiration and your wonderful podcast.

    • Gokul Ramesh

      Thank you Sidz….
      It was quite revealing Podcast.
      Fear, Prev-conditionings, Lack of STRONG/FIXED goals & thus getting into adhoc lifestyle, bad attitude (subconscious -ve energy frame work) & not learning…. seem to be biggest hurdles for many….

      Thank you for shedding light on these… so that we can practically work on them.

    • Digital NiGo

      The 11 attributes which stuck people from success is really useful and mind opened podcast by my only mentor Sidz .

      My short keynotes as follows:

      1. Fear- Whether it is of success or failures always kills our mind.
      2. Conformity- Don’t be a people pleasure person.
      3. Blaming Others – Bless your enemies.
      4. Previous Conditioning – Change your thought processes.
      5. Family & Friends- Avoid poison love.
      6. Rigid Thinking- Don’t think that your way is the highway.
      7.Bad Attitude- Always dangerous so kill it first.
      8.Not having clear goal – Write your goal on daily basis.
      9. Resentment-Learn to accept the situation.
      10. Ego – No more Ego only We go..
      11. Not Learning – Recharge your batteries before it dries out.

      Really most of the above attributes also stucks me personally which I have to be careful about.

      Can say it’s a BULB ON podcast for me .

      #ILHDeeplearner,#Youcancoach,#Icancoach

    • Balaraju Puri

      Hi Sidz,

      Really Awesome and Eye opening Podcast for many especially me. I am in Situation of below attributes.

      1. FEAR – Frankly I am Fear of The Unknown Inside but outside I am the DARE person to do many things. Y because it is Negativity of thinking and Around people with you in daily life -> Solution – DO IT ANYWAY is ultimate.

      2. Conformity – Yes, I always want to be Good for all and Perfectionism ( Even though god also not able to satisfy many people – IT runs according to KARMA( many people don’t feel but it is fact)) is the Real Conformities -> Straight to the people about Facts and situations.

      3. Blaming the persons -> Solution – Give pure love (Dhramaraj) because we learnt the many lessons with them.

      4. Previous Conditioning – About Money and any other – I should not worry bec it has already happened we can’t change the PAST but we can end Up with Good ending.

      5. Family & Friends – Close friends and Family are real Poisson of Love – What kind of things are doing? – I should Step out these situations.

      Once Again Thanks Sidz putting Podcast on these. Soon I will come out of this situation.

      Best Regards,

    • Chethan Shenoy

      Extremely valuable insights. Just that we need to follow these. #ilhdeeplearner

    • BSA AYYAPPA

      Hi Siddharth,
      Really Awesome and Eye opening Podcast for many especially me. I am in Situation of below attributes;

      1st attribute is about “FEAR” and “SOLUTION” to that is “Do it anyway”(positive mindset)
      1. Fear of success– overfull of success is also dangerous leads to bad behaviour
      2. Fear of failure– past negative thoughts can impact
      3. Fear of unknown– worries about future and life to overcome it do meditation, spiritually grounded

      2nd attribute about”CONFORMITY”
      1. Meaning– people’s pleasing and stuck in to prove yourself perfect,to everyone and you become a doormate
      2. Overcome– Be a open minded and tell them what u are thinking about them in a obedient manner

      3rd attribute about “BLAMING OTHERS” and “SOLUTION” is be lovable and kind towards them
      1. Blaming cannot leads to any kind of result,but finally you are the one who stuck in it
      2. Example; Between spouses, family,relatives and others because of them only you could change things, and prove them they are wrong. So, that be thankful to your enemies

      4th attribute about “PREVIOUS CONDITIONING”
      1. Meaning– It’s about lifestyle conditioned by your parents, forefathers and the way u look the world view
      2. Positive, negative CONDITIONING
      3. By attending personal development programs your view can be changed and thinking process to others will improve

      5th attribute about “FAMILY & FRIENDS” who are very closest to your heart ❤️
      1. They think if u would change, the status-quo between them might be affected
      2. So, if u become successful those are the one who apolode and encourage you
      3. Finally it’s your duty to convince them and make a move towards your success journey

      6th attribute about “RIGID THINKING” you can rigid on goals but flexible on methods
      1. It’s about not to be stuck in rigid things rather than do high priority values

      #ilhdeeplearner
      #youcancoach
      #icancoach

    • Sunil Gupta

      11 Dangerous Attributes That Keep People Stuck In Life

      https://siddharthrajsekar.com/stuck-in-life/

      Hi Sidz,

      One of the best podcast at the right time. Many golden nuggets and can relate to them, specially fear and resentment. Surely taking action to remove these and become unstoppable from now on…

      Here are the key takeaways:

      1. Fear:

      Fear of unknown, failure, success

      Solution:

      – Spiritual grounding helps
      – be mindful of negativity which leads to fear
      – meditation
      – do it anyway
      – keep mind positive
      – no newspaper or negativity info like drama etc

      2. Conformity:

      – Conforming to others people opinion
      – People pleasure

      Solution:

      – Don’t be doormat for others
      – Voice out your original opinion
      – emotional release
      – Just be straight without being rude in a nice way

      3. Blaming others:

      – Someone blamed for being responsible for your fate
      – Entitlement for being blaming others
      – Blaming can happen in any relation

      Solution:

      – Don’t waste your energy on this
      – Bless them even to enemies
      – I wish you good luck, but you are not in my life
      – See them as cause of lesson
      – be mindful that blaming will not help
      – bless them and move on
      – follow Yudhistra model

      4. Previous conditioning

      – Your lifestyle in a particular way
      – Positive or negative
      – auto mode happens
      – Money mindset
      – Your world view about money, people, spirituality

      Solution

      – Personal development program taking care of your world view about money, people, spirituality

      Be mindful

      5. Family and friends

      – close people they do not want you to change
      – you need to evolve on day-to-day basis
      – Don’t pull people down
      – change management

      Solution:

      – Believe in yourself
      – poison love needs to be avoided
      – their view may or may not help
      – reclaim you space
      – It’s ok to step out from approval zone of your family and friends
      – take your own business decisions and lifestyle decisions

      6. Rigid thinking

      – it’s my way or highway
      – be fixed on your vision but flexible on how you go there, but problem is goal is flexible and route is fixed
      – e.g. Bamboo is flexible but rigid trees break

      Solution:

      – You can be rigid on values, e.g. no
      smoking/no gambling/no extra marital affairs etc.

      7. Not having clear goals

      – taking life on day-to-day basis
      – Living a complete ad hoc life. Let’s see what happens tomorrow

      Solution:

      – stranger secrets of the world
      – daily goal writing
      – Google map example

      8. Resentment:

      – closure to blame
      – bitter indignation or having been treated unfairly
      – the world is bad place
      – the world is unfair
      – people are not good

      Solution:

      – there is better place to go
      – the best form of service
      – find your purpose
      – live a purposeful life

      9. Bad attitude:

      – Putting people down
      – few minutes talk whether energy sucked or boost when walk away

      Solution:

      – Be mindful to your attitude

      10. Ego:

      – Person sense of self-esteem
      you are the ultimate goal of every one

      Solution:

      – Treat yourself as servant to serve the humanity

      11. Non learning:

      – If not growing, you are automatically dying
      – entropy example
      – Gradual decline naturally everything

      Solution:
      – Understand the natural laws
      – be a lifelong learner

      Thanks for sharing this
      Sunil Gupta

      #Ilhdeeplearner
      #youcancoach
      #Icancoach
      #casunilgupta95

    • Poonam Patel

      Fabulous post.. Bulb on moment. For me what needs to go are the ones mentioned below:

      1) Fear – of being successful as well as failure.
      2) Conformity – constant approval seeking.
      3) Blaming others – How few bad incidents are emptying me of my energy.
      4) Family and friends – Do not want me to change. Me as a person hates changes. Drilling how change is a given.
      5) Rigid thinking – Goal has to be fixed and how you get there flxeible.
      6) Clarity of goals – how you should have a goal in life and then move towards it. Example of google maps hit bulls eye!
      7) Do not let people drain your energy or drain theirs.. The vibe you give or get. Pay attention to it.

    • Inder jeet Singh ubhi

      My take away from this us follows
      – income
      – relationship
      – money bad situation
      1. Fear for unknown failure
      – negative situation in the past
      Solution – do it own way
      2. Conformity
      – people pleaser
      Solution talking and speaking straight
      3. Blaming others
      – do not worries what others do in the life
      – family members
      – relatives
      Solution – from every person you learn lessons
      4. Previous condutings
      – positive and negative conditions
      5. Family and friends
      – people closed to you, do not want to change
      – approval from family, friends for doing anything in life
      – poison love
      6. Regid thinking
      – be fixed on your goal and flexible
      – flexible on method
      – Regid on values
      7. Not having clear goal
      – life day to day basis
      – balance your goal
      – Google Map
      8 resentment /blame
      – treated unfairly
      – better destination
      – best use of service
      – purpose life
      – positive frame work
      9. Bad attitude
      – people putting down
      – negative attitude person
      10 ego
      – people self estime
      -false ego
      – impact on life other’s person
      11. Not learning
      – not growing
      – intrope
      – in life in every stage man learn something from others

    • Ushnish Chattopadhyay

      Awesome insights sidz! One of the best from your side. Amazing how authentic you remain, and how much effort you put in creating such a piece. Hats off! One highlights that really moved (in fact almost all insights moved me), was that “blaming others” one. Outstanding, the way you explained.

    • Wilson Rodrigues

      Too many things holding us back – I truly resonate with these thoughts. Until we acknowledge these, that itself is holding us back. Very well articulated Sidz! Glad to have a mentor like you! #ILHfamily #ILHdeeplearner

    • Aruna Singh

      Self discovery……stinking thinking :-
      1. Fear- unknown, failure, success…do it any way! Stay away from negativity. Be mindful of negativity.
      2. Conformity – keep pleasing others, you end up becoming a door mat. Cant voice out, pressure being built up. Talk and share your feelings.
      3. Blaming others – pointing out to people and blame others. Believing to be entitled. Just show love and bless them.
      4. Previous conditioning – upbringing, thoughts about money, spirituality, etc
      5. Family & friends – they do not want to change, progressive thoughts and actions have to keep happening. Approvals seeking may or may not help. Protection keeps us shielded which does not allow us to blossom.
      6. Rigid thinking – My way or the high way. Be fixed on your goal but be flexible on the methods. Have value system.
      7. Not having clear goals – Living life as it comes. Have definite goals. What you want has to be clear to you.
      8. Resentment – Towards people, world in general, you are manifesting negativity. Make best use of self and have purposeful life.
      9. Bad attitude – Putting people down, over confidence, are you giving positive vibes to people or not. Be energy giver and not toxic.
      10. Ego – Think big of self.
      11. Not learning – if not learning we are dying . If you are disintegrating in to disorder. So keep learning and growing.
      This podcast was amazing to the point and absolutely true. Thank you for this!!!!

    • Firdous Guffor Misgar

      The biggest take aways from this podcast are as :
      Don’t get allured by shiny objects
      Love yourself
      Respect yourself
      Above all hang with like minded people

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